Gli ultimi anni della mia vita sono stati anni di scoperte dolorose e di profonda sofferenza vissuta in uno stato di completo isolamento.Proprio quando credevo di avere superato il peggio ho scoperto di avere accumulato un dolore che non mi sono mai permessa di vivere.Ho scoperto di essere sopravvissuta per decenni soffocando il mio cuore e le mie emozioni.
Quando sei circondata fin da bambina da persone che vogliono usarti non hai altra scelta che concentrarti su quello che vogliono e darglielo.Ma, in questo modo, smetti di crescere e perdi completamente la fiducia in te stessa e la voglia di vivere. Sopravvivi, ma emotivamente sei morta.
Sono stati anni speciali, anni in cui ho incontrato virtualmente persone con un passato simile al mio, con sensibilita' particolari, con un grande cuore, con un grande spirito.
Sono stati anni di solitudine, in cui ho dovuto allontanare la mia famiglia dalla mia vita ed ho scelto la mia vera famiglia tra gli angeli e le anime di luce.
Ci sono stati tanti eventi speciali che non ho compreso inizialmente, ma che oggi trovano lentamente una spiegazione.
Qualche anno addietro una cara amica mi racconto' di essere stata stuprata quando era poco piu' che adolescente, il pomeriggio successivo dormivo insieme al mio compagno. Improvvisamente mi risvegliai o credetti di essere sveglia e vidi sul tetto della camera una grossa libellula rossa che era appena uscita dal mio corpo e fluttuava sul soffitto.Ero spaventata, urlavo, ma non riuscivo a muovermi. La libellula cerco' di tornare indietro, verso di me, ma io la allontanai con le mai.
La libellula era un segno della trasformazione che la mia vita stava seguendo e di un segreto che ero pronta alla luce.
The last years of my life have been years of painful discoveries and deep suffering that I have carried on completed lonely.When I thought having passed the worst time of my life I discovered that I had accumulated a pain that I have not ever permitted to myself to live.I have discovered to have survived suffocating my heart and my emotions. When since childhood you are surrounded by people who want to use you do not have other choice that focus on what want they want and give them.But living like that means stopping growing and completely lose the confidence in yourself. I have survived, but emotionally I was dead.These last years have been special years for me, years when I met virtually people with a past similar to mine, with a deep sensitivity, with a big heart, with a deep soul. It have been years of solitude, distancing myself from my native family and choosing my real family among the angels and souls of light.
A few years ago a dear friend tells me she was raped when she was a little more than a teenager, the next afternoon I was sleeping with my partner. Suddenly I opened my eyes and I saw close to the roof of my room a large red dragonfly that was flying out of my body and floated on the roof.I was really scary,but I could not move . The dragonfly tried to move back to my body, but I removed her using my hands. The dragonfly was a sign of the transformation that my life was following and showing me a secret that I was ready to discover.
The last years of my life have been years of painful discoveries and deep suffering that I have carried on completed lonely.When I thought having passed the worst time of my life I discovered that I had accumulated a pain that I have not ever permitted to myself to live.I have discovered to have survived suffocating my heart and my emotions. When since childhood you are surrounded by people who want to use you do not have other choice that focus on what want they want and give them.But living like that means stopping growing and completely lose the confidence in yourself. I have survived, but emotionally I was dead.These last years have been special years for me, years when I met virtually people with a past similar to mine, with a deep sensitivity, with a big heart, with a deep soul. It have been years of solitude, distancing myself from my native family and choosing my real family among the angels and souls of light.
A few years ago a dear friend tells me she was raped when she was a little more than a teenager, the next afternoon I was sleeping with my partner. Suddenly I opened my eyes and I saw close to the roof of my room a large red dragonfly that was flying out of my body and floated on the roof.I was really scary,but I could not move . The dragonfly tried to move back to my body, but I removed her using my hands. The dragonfly was a sign of the transformation that my life was following and showing me a secret that I was ready to discover.

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